Click on a FAQ below to see the answer. Don’t see your question? Contact Us. We’d be happy to talk with you.
When is the best time to begin mediating?
As soon as you can.
In an ongoing unresolved conflict or situation, communication can breakdown, tempers flare, and misunderstandings can complicate matters.
Research says the earlier you start mediating in a divorce, the more likely you are to reach agreements.
If you can make the decisions together in mediation, you control what will happen in your situation.
Is mediation ever inappropriate?
Talk to your attorney and your mediator. See “I’m afraid or worried” for more information.
I'm afraid or worried. What can I do?
Talk to your attorney and your mediator. See “I’m afraid or worried” for more information.
What does a mediator do?
Mediators help people have the kind of conversation they want to have but have not been able to on their own.
MEDIATORS DO:
- Give each person a chance to tell their perspectives.
- Allow individuals to be heard and to share their concerns.
MEDIATORS DO NOT:
- Make decisions for you.
- Give advice.
- Make recommendations to the court or any other authority.
What can be discussed or decided?
You can talk about anything you both want to talk about and you don’t have to talk about anything you don’t want to talk about.
There is only one issue which cannot be discussed and that is whether or not domestic abuse has occurred.
How long does mediation take?
It depends. If you have a couple of issues to resolve, it may take just one two-hour mediation session. If you have a range of matters and you need to gather more information, it might take from two to six sessions. The decisions are yours: what you talk about, when the session is over, whether to come back.
What happens is up to you.
What if mediation doesn’t work?
Don’t let
- skepticism,
- lack of trust in the other person, or
- what others think or say
determine or predict your mediation experience.
The success rate for mediation is over 70%! You can join the successful people who have been surprised and relieved at how mediation worked for them!
Will I need an attorney?
In divorce and custody cases, it is recommended that you get an attorney, especially if you have minor children, have joint debts, and/or you have joint ownership of anything.
On a personal level, you are the experts about your situation.
There are legal aspects to your situation. Whether or not you know or understand the law, it will impact your situation.
It is important to know the range of what the court might decide on different issues in your situation and why. An attorney can advise you of any legal, financial and/or tax consequences to your situation. You want to make informed decisions in mediation. You want to know the consequences to your decisions.
How do I choose an attorney?
Your attorney will be your mentor during an important time in your life.
It is essential you choose someone who shares your goals. You need to feel comfortable expressing yourself. Trust is important. If you want to mediate, you need an attorney who will support you and help prepare you for mediation.
Ask your friends, family and others you respect what attorney they would recommend and why.
Check out some attorneys. Ask them:
- Do you support mediation?
- How do you help your clients prepare for mediation? (before and in between sessions?)
- What is the percentage of your clients who mediate and reach an agreement?
- What is the percentage of you clients who go to trial? Why is that?
- Are you willing to be an advisor and mentor? Or are you usually an advocate in court?
- Some attorneys offer ‘unbundled legal services,’ where the person and the attorney agree on specific tasks the attorney will do. Google ‘unbundled legal services’ and then ask attorneys whether they do this.
You want an attorney who is a good match for you.